Posts Tagged ‘reciprocity’

Today, I want to start coaching you again on becoming a greater success in whatever you do. I will share with you a simple but powerful truth: “If you want to increase your success, you must:

1.)    Know what you really want in life

2.)    Have the will and desire to go for it; and

3.)    Learn from the experience your journey will bring

So let me ask you: “Do you Really Want to Succeed?”

If you follow what I have to say, I guarantee that you will be successful sooner rather than later.

Tell me if you can relate: Too many times, we get distracted with all that’s happening with everything around us. We run around like headless chickens and most of the time we spend all our energies on things that get us nowhere. It can’t be helped, that is what Life does, it provides you with challenges and distractions which you have to figure out what to do.

What I’ve realized early on and what Life has taught me is that you can’t handle everything without going crazy.

So lesson number 1 to be successful is to “simplify your life”. Every now and then, when I begin to feel overwhelmed, I undergo a “Life simplification” ritual. This basically means, I remove and let go of all the things that are weighing me down. I choose what I really want to be doing and achieving and I focus on (at most) only 3 of them at any given time. I become obsessed with the things I choose to focus on and nothing else matters until I achieve the goals that I set.

Are you overwhelmed right now? Then it’s time to simplify your life and figure out what you want to achieve.

Once you figure out what you want to do. Here comes the next step: Have the will and desire to achieve it.

If there is one thing about me, it is that I will never give up a goal that I set in my head. If I “suck” at that particular area in my life, and I truly want to improve that area, I will keep at it until I get it right. I call it “Stick-to-it-ivity”. In other words, I finish what I start. I guess it was how I was brought up. When my mom would tell me “finish your food”, I obeyed. But kidding aside, it is a trait that you have to develop for yourself, there is one very successful entrepreneur who also has this quality and he goes by the name of Walt Disney. Disney did not start out as a success story immediately, in fact there were huge set backs in his life that if he did not “stick to it”, where would we be?

The trick with never giving up a goal for me is what I learned about life early on. Life will always test your resolve. Life will throw you obstacles and problems that you never thought of. You will be discouraged by people that you love. You will feel frustrated and ignored by the people that you set out to help, you feel that life is hard and are inches away from giving in and giving up. At this point I tell myself 6 very powerful words:

Never give in, Never give up.

Because the true secret about the hardships of life is this: “Life’s purpose is not to make you fail, life’s purpose is to make you succeed. (Even though it does not seem that way). Life is a great teacher, the obstacles are how it teaches you to be better. “when life seems to want you to turn around, it is actually a signal for you to keep going. When things get tough, it is the most critical sign that you are doing exactly what you are supposed to be doing.”

Trust me on this because every time I achieve a goal, the larger the success I become.

Are you having a hard time with what you are trying to achieve right now? Remember NEVER GIVE IN, NEVER GIVE UP. I guarantee that if this is what you really want in life and you follow what I say, you will succeed sooner rather than later.

Now the last step is the most practical step of all: Be willing to invest the time and effort in increasing your skills to achieve what it is you are trying to achieve.

I’m a fervent believer that learning never stops in the classroom and that Life will teach you things that you never thought possible. However, the problem with learning with life alone is that it is learning by trial and error. So if you can avoid trial and error altogether and learn from someone who has achieved more than you, then that would even be better don’t you think so?

So before I get into something that I have no clue on, I always make it a point to “invest in myself” first. Meaning, I will never hesitate to buy and learn from books and seminars, learning events, and spending time learning with people more knowledgeable than me. And once I listen to what they have to say, I apply the lessons immediately and start to really learn through a little trial and error of my own. And although I will still make mistakes, I drastically reduce the errors and the time to achieving my goals.

So if you want to really succeed in anything that you want to do, follow the three things that I do. And you will see that you can be a success sooner rather than later.


Bizmaker1I was invited to talk to a public crowd in the Fil-Negosyo expo in SM Mega mall a few years ago about how to start and succeed in business. And I happened to mention in that talk what I believe to be the golden rule that any business person (or individual) should follow. Now this saying is as old as the bible itself as this is where it comes from:

“Do unto others what you want others to do unto you.”

Here’s a true story that will prove my point.

A few years back, I had partnered with a local IT Training company to bring in a foreign Software company into the Philippines. (I’m leaving the names out as you will see why in a bit). This was a 60/40 arrangement, I had 40% of the profits but I do not spend a dime. They agreed to have 60% of the profits but would shoulder all the financial requirements (How I did it will be a story for another article).  We needed an IT trainer who was knowledgeable and seasoned enough to head the training program. So I chanced upon the resume of this guy who stood out from the rest. He really wasn’t that senior and he didn’t have that much experience with the particular software but after I had a chance to talk to him, I knew he was the guy. I asked him how much his salary was at the IT company he was working for at that time, kept mental note of it then told him that I would get back to him within the week.

I pushed for him as the man for the job, negotiated a compensation package with the IT Training company and they agreed. Long story short, when I told him he was to report for his new role for head of technical training, the next Monday he was near tears as his income more than tripled.  I had helped him move up.

Soon after, the partnership became a success, project after project we were making good money, but after a year and a half, the IT company had re-organized and the new management had different plans. the partnership was dissolved and the guy that I helped had moved on. Well, at least it was good while it lasted I just said to myself.

Many months later, out of the blue, I get a phone call from an unknown number. I picked it up and wouldn’t you know it, it was him, the guy I helped hire. He was pirated by an even bigger company and wanted to thank me for what I did for him before, and there was one more thing, his Clients from the past wanted him to handle a specific IT training for them. He could easily do it by himself he said, but he just couldn’t do that to me and felt an obligation to bring business to my door.

I asked him how much the deal was and what he needed from me. He said, he’ll only take a small training fee and the rest of the profits will be mine. The deal was for P535,000 and he only took P50,000 for his teaching fees. The project was for next month he said, all I have to do is say yes to it and he would make the necessary arrangements. The project pushed through and several projects more, this time he had repaid me with the same (if not more) prosperity as I had provided him. This is called Reciprocity. And this is why I say in business, the golden rule is: Do unto others as you want others to do for you.

Now, how can you practice the art of Reciprocity in your everyday lives and not just in business? Well, in general, and if you have not yet done so, simply be nice to the people  around you – smile and they will smile back at you, frown and they will move away from you. Help them with something that they need help with without asking for anything in return. Keep doing it until it becomes a part of you and you will see what I mean.

In Business, like life, learn to give first truly and sincerely and somehow,  some way, some day you will receive something too.

Sidebar: Last week, the Philippines was hit by the worst flash flood in more than 40 years. Practice the principle of reciprocity not just in business but as Filipinos. Help those who need it and in turn you will be helped when you need it as well.